I'm exhausted

I only wanna ufff. To cease moving. I have to go to bed early, it's imperative that I don't forget it at the last minute. Listen, others do it, I do it too, with less effort because I'm better, I want this to be true but is it? Could it be I'm one of the others, one not as good but making up with effort. I think I felt disdain for them, the me's, but I can't remember, it wouldn't even make sense to exist. My work consists in giving my all every day, so I do, and very much so. And because of that I don't get the maximum return, that is, I'm working hard, but by not working with all I've got I'm giving myself more work. I want to eat and sleep. Not to speak to myself in this tone.