The Sixth day

I didn't write about my day off, my single day off, because there's nothing to write about. I couldn't go to a party with John, because if I did I'd go back home in the morning and wouldn't even perceive the break. I didn't meet up with a friend, he couldn't make it, secretly maybe I didn't want him to make it because it would entail some activity, I'd prefer an unnactive day. Another friend showed up instead and we talked, it was the usual fun but unremarkable. That I have nothing to write about it while having plenty to say about the robot world is telling. • Today I made no sales, my body isn't tired, I had a reasonable amount of fun, but now I have just a resigned smirk on my face. Yes, Boss, zero, I might be just fooling everyone, but numbers won't lie. • Worst of all is that I enjoyed it slightly, I want to get better. I want to clear the crystal clear hurdles I see in front of me. I want to spend the little time I have left in the day to be better tomorrow. I ask you, the mechanic, tighten my suspension, grease my joints. But when I get home I won't give a fuck, I think not, perhaps I can overturn myself. In the morning I won't put the effort, I hate mornings, perhaps I can overturn it. I need a new BIOS, I need a reboot. I need to believe in the system, but doesn't this go against what I always do? I've made a point not to trust things till they prove themselves, on the other hand, time and time again I've learned that you need to give things a chance. Impact is powerful, but it's not substantial, just a gateway. I should give myself fully, for a little while, if I don't want to leave (and live) in doubt.