The Pleasure is in Taking the Woman

• Their smiles. This is not love. This is not seduction. They see you, and before they turn away, they laugh openly, so you can see their giddiness, on how your mere existence is the funniest thing they've ever seen, but not in a bad way, not like the old days with their mokery and hopelessness. You are not a monster anymore. • And when they turn around and keep walking, all it takes is a piece of ass bouncing to inflate a man's mind with wonderful projection. And when I say "piece of ass" I don't mean a woman, I mean that piece of physical ass girating there, especially in this century where every woman wears form fitting ass clothes, and especially in this country where there are no bad asses. The best ones are soft fabric trousers, any color, a centimeter dividing the eyes from the touch, every little jiggle clear as day as they walk away. There's nothing else that should be thought besides "She should be on top of me." • And that's the pleasure in the title: you meet a girl, and she has a smile like she's ready to be met, by a certain collection of candidates, it just so happens to be you, and yet she doesn't even know she's aching to be met, and therein is the beauty of it. Your specter greets her and everything you say is the perfect thing to say. She smiles and smiles till she can't smile anymore and stays at that limit, her brain making up all kinds of beutiful stories about every detail about you that is mysterious to her now when you're still the perfect man. This is the woman most pleasurable to take, if I wasn't writing I'd masturbate right now, if I wasn't at work. These women get at deeper cemn (sic) from you. They aren't the whore who see you at the distance and make you their marks. And they're not your loves which every joining is another block in the edifice of love. It is true excitement. It is getting the thing you want. The thing at hand. How all worlds seem to collide when all this works to give you the chance to take a woman, not be taken, to be the peacock rather than stuck in the spider's web. • It's hard to walk away from this, but thee are bigger things to build. I don't miss it now as I think I would have missed it before. I've changed, everything can change, and change again. Like before though, smiles will weave fantasies still.